Monday 16 August 2010

My Little Ramazan - Day Six

Mon 16th August 2010

Right, I’d like to start by saying that Ramazan has positively torn apart any daily routine I might have previously had. Some of that tearing has been good. Pretty, origami-type tearing with neat edges and beautiful folds. Some of that tearing has been horrific. Ripped apart in disrespectful fistfuls. Let’s start with the crappy tearing.

Dry mouth. Short temper. Mood swings. All of these have been bad but, also to be expected considering the distinct lack of sustenance. But god knows I did not expect such an overwhelming sense of tiredness. Yes, I know, it’s my own silly fault for offering to support my husband in his crazy fasting ritual. Nobody actually invited me to join in, after all. But I didn’t know Ramazan would turn everything upside down, now did I?

Imagine this: you get up early in the morning to tend to a demanding (but equally gorgeous) two year old boy. You do all the mummy-type things expected of you throughout a typical day: preparing meals, offering snacks, trips to the park, building tower blocks, learning the words to Bob The Builder, cleaning, dish-washing, nappy-changing . . . you get the general gist. But, your life really begins after sundown. Which at this time of year in the Highlands, is approximately 9pm. So, at a time when I would usually be winding down with a good book or a bit of Gok Wan, I’m flitting about the kitchen, preparing food, downing glasses of juice, eating said food and subsequently washing more dishes, preparing more food (midnight feast) and welcoming my husband home from work. To all intents and purposes, I am a housewife caught in a typical 5o’clock flurry. Only it’s not 5o’clock, it’s midnight. And there’s still a blog to write.

I. Am. Knackered.

And then, whilst I’m scrubbing a frying pan to within an inch of its life, my husband proceeds to tell me that it is now the time of year for the Turkish football league to start and all the players will be participating in Ramazan. Yes they will be practicing and training and playing in 45 degree heat, but still they will stick to their cause. They don’t need food and water. They don’t get ill or tired. In fact, my husband has never heard of anybody getting ill or tired during Ramazan. Really? I think, as I grip the handle of the frying pan. Well be careful Mustafa because there’s a first time for everything . . .

But, to give him his dues, he did get half the day off work today so I could have a nap before dinner time. He did go to the shop and buy me three bunches of flowers. He did – and has done since I agreed to go ahead with this – kiss me (on the cheek) at every available opportunity. He is positively oozing gratitude which reminds me why I’m doing this in the first place. This is the best present I could have given him. Support, love, interest and understanding – all wrapped up in a big grumpy, empty-bellied parcel.

And about that beautiful, origami-tearing apart of my schedule. Okay so I’m tired. Okay so my body feels noticeably heavier (not lighter, as I’d secretly hoped). But I am earning some wonderful moments out of this. Tonight, for example, we awaited the arrival of my auntie who is staying with us for a few days and swanned about the kitchen together, preparing a gorgeous meal, with soft music playing and candles lit everywhere. Last night, for example, we wrapped ourselves in a duvet, lay in front of the telly and had a feast of tea and biscuits. Then there’s the total euphoria of drinking our first glass of water together at 9pm. What an incredible thing to share. It might sound ridiculous that a glass of water could bring such romance, excitement and gratitude into a relationship. But there it is.

These are moments usually found during special occasions which, in all fairness I suppose Ramazan is. And maybe today, that’s what I’m beginning to see. This is a special occasion and it is a special thing to share. As one of my friends put it in an e-mail to me today: ‘I have to tell you how thoughtful and loving your gesture is. Love is about sharing, respecting each other, doing things as a couple and showing how much you care for one another.’ I’ve printed this message out and pinned it on my wall so I can see it every day. Next time I’m wondering what the heck I’ve got myself into, this will be a firm reminder.

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